'Seek not for love,
but merely seek for all the barriers
you have built against it.'
— Rumi
You don't have to seek
Self-love.
I just thought that word was so boring, outdated,
and I truly did not know how that thing called self-love would ever solve my problems.
I could not have been more wrong.
Back then.
It turned out to be the breakthrough in my awakening process.
Self-love helped me raise my frequency,
where I could meet the frequency of Source,
the frequency of my True Divine Essence.
And then truly everything began to shift.
Self-love.
It is not a thing.
It is a frequency.
It is the frequency we were made with.
So instead of searching out there...
In relationships.
In success.
In achievement.
In being seen.
In being chosen.
In being understood.
I am learning more and more that it is truly something different.
So, my question to you bis:
Where are you looking for Love right now?
I can tell you this:
What we are truly searching for is much closer than we realize.
Beneath all those desires lives a deeper longing:
the longing to come Home to ourselves.
This exploration is an invitation to rediscover the relationship beneath everything.
The relationship you have with yourself.
With the whole of you.
With all of you.
Not only with the parts of you that feel confident, aligned and open.
But also with the parts that feel afraid.
The parts that feel rejected.
The parts that learned to survive.
Healing begins when every part of you is allowed to belong.
And every part so deserves to be loved.
You deserve to be loved.
To be self-loved,
because no one can do that better than you. ;-)
Looking for Love
I thought I was looking for Love.
Now I know I wasn't.
At least, not in the way I understand it now.
I was looking for safety.
For reassurance.
For belonging.
For someone to tell me I was okay.
For someone to choose me.
For someone to stay.
For someone to make me feel whole.
And because I did not know that,
I looked for those things outside of myself.
In relationships.
In work.
In achievement.
In helping others.
In being useful.
In being needed.
In being seen.
And every time I found a little bit of it,
it felt good.
For a while.
And then it disappeared again.
So I kept searching.
The next thing.
The next person.
The next achievement.
The next experience.
Always believing that what I was looking for was somewhere outside of me.
Now I know (it took a while, but better late than never, I figured ;-)):
What I was really looking for
was not another person.
Not more success.
Not more approval.
I was looking for a feeling.
A feeling of safety.
A feeling of connection.
A feeling of belonging.
A feeling of Love.
And feelings do not live outside of us.
They live within us.
That was a huge shift for me.
Because if what I am looking for is a feeling,
then no person can truly give it to me.
No circumstance can truly give it to me.
No achievement can truly give it to me.
They can trigger it.
Reflect it.
Awaken it.
But the feeling itself
has always been within me.
Loving myself for that,
for the deep inner knowing that I already am all of it.
I am all of it beyond the noise of the ego;
there is this vastness of my energyfield,
that is pure presence,
pure Love.
and deeply connected to my Source.
This connection is for me self-love.
And from that energy, my energyfield expands,
and in that awareness every part of me that got stuck somewhere down the road
start to come Home.
In self-love.
In that frequency.
What you seek, is seeking you.
Why Love can feel so difficult
If Love is our nature,
why does it often feel so difficult to experience?
That is a question I have asked myself many times.
And I think the answer is actually quite simple.
Life happens.
We come into this world completely open.
Open-hearted.
Open-minded.
Open to life itself.
Deeply connected to our True Self,
to our Creator,
to Home.
And then we come in here.
Into this reality.
Into this dense frequency.
And our programming starts to change.
We inherit frequencies that are not really ours.
We begin adapting.
We learn what is accepted.
What is rejected.
What is safe.
And what is not.
We learn how to survive.
We learn how to belong.
We learn how to avoid pain.
And alongside the pain we experience,
we develop a wounded part within us that needs protection.
Our protective mechanism does a very, very, very good job.
Falling in Love again and again
And slowly,
without even realizing it,
we move away from ourselves.
We begin carrying a different frequency.
I guess that is the most uncomfortable thing of all:
not being yourself anymore.
But we adapt because it seems to be the normal thing to do here.
So we play along.
Without knowing it.
But at the same time,
deep, deep, deep down in our heart,
there remains this feeling:
there must be more.
And then the ego starts looking outside of itself
for what it feels disconnected from within itself.
Love.
Safety.
Belonging.
Worth.
Connection.
And because we are looking in the wrong place,
the search never really ends.
At least not for long.
We keep chasing the next thing.
The next moment.
The next fulfilment.
Until...
Until...
Something cracks open.
Until we begin turning inward.
Until we begin listening.
Feeling.
Owning.
Allowing.
This is why self-love feels so important to me now.
It is teaching me to let go of that old mechanism
and return to my first Love.
My first crush.
The crush on me.
On my own frequency.
On my own energy.
On the energy of my connection to Creator
and to my True Divine Essence.
On my own incarnation here.
On my own human.
That feeling of falling in Love.
I want to fall into that Love
over and over and over again.
This is a journey.
The journey back to ourselves.
The journey back to the places where we left ourselves behind.
And slowly,
piece by piece,
bringing ourselves Home again.
Coming Home in the Love you are
Today, when I hear the words self-love,
I no longer think about self-improvement.
Or fixing myself.
Or becoming a better version of myself.
I think about frequency.
I think about resonance.
I think about coming Home.
Because the more I reconnect with my own frequency,
the more everything changes.
But because I change first.
Because I already feel the Love that I am.
The Love I am made with.
The way the Universe just adores me.
And you.
Then we can stop searching. Chasing. Trying.
Instead,
we begin remembering.
Remembering who we are.
Remembering what we are.
Remembering the Love we are.
The Love that was always there.
Underneath the fear.
Underneath the conditioning.
Underneath the survival patterns.
And from there,
something beautiful happens.
Life starts flowing again.
I am simply allowing more of me to be here.
More of my truth.
More of my essence.
More of my frequency.
Self-love:
Ah, yes, it is falling in Love with who you already are.
Again. And again. And again.
Woh.
This is a frequency
and you can start to remember it.
The privilege of a lifetime is to become who you truly are.
Carl Jung
Continue exploring
Take your time.
Explore gently.
And enjoy discovering
more of who you truly are.
Explore this theme
Every theme is a doorway.
Trust what resonates and allow your own guidance to lead the way.
Go deeper
Ready for a deeper experience?
Explore a SideTrack and immerse yourself in one specific area of transformation.
Experience this together
While much of this work happens within, it can also be powerful to explore these themes together.
Listen to a podcast that emerged from a live exploration and experience the insights, questions and reflections that unfold in a shared space.
Continue the Journey
Back to top