About the birth of the Source -
and everything that followed from there.
What a journey it has been.
And still is.
From the moment Edwin texted me:
“Eef, shall we align?”
something started moving.
As if a wave picked me up —
and I’m still riding it.
Embodied sharing – Life flowing through me
It feels like I’m working on many threads at once.
Or rather:
like Life itself is weaving them through me.
A piece here. A piece there.
Testing. Tuning.
Writing. Letting it flow.
New content for the CoreTrack.
New SideTracks.
New words.
Courses that want to be reborn.
And born.
Everything unfolds in layers.
The energetic and the practical.
The flow and the form.
Every day I feel waves of appreciation
The people behind the field
Edwin — your grounding, your technical vision, your endless support.
Without you, The Source wouldn’t exist as it does now.
Thank you for your creativity, your devotion, and your intention:
to contribute to the frequency of this planet. I feel it in everything.
Floris — your very first whisper, that this was meant to become an app.
I didn’t dare. But you saw it.
And so it began, step by step.
Every time I record something, I use your podcast set.
And it just fits.
Apeldoorn — the place, the garden, the home. It represents me, coming Home.
Hyacintha, your energy of Source which you brought there, your invitation.
Everything is infused with Source. The walls, the garden, everything.
The place breathes remembrance.
Frits — your music isn’t background sound.
It is a carrier of the Field itself.
Source frequency, translated into tone.
Supporting every word, every intention, every moment of the Journey.
It is raising our vibration as we listen to the sound.
And also, thank you to everyone with whom I’ve shared deep experience —
thank you for being here, or having been here.
Our co-creation opens channels of inspiration through me.
Because of you, I can feel the rawness of life —
and also the shift into a completely new perspective.
All themes are mirrored to me by Life itself,
through you.
And for that… I’m endlessly grateful.
Portals into rawness. Into truth.
Into the consciousness that lives underneath.
Without you… there would be no Source as it now lives.
And then… this.
Thank you — to all of you who are here, reading this:
I feel so much tenderness. Gratitude.
For each and every one of you.
For those who have been here for years.
Since the first prayer in the Signal group.
Since the early sharing on Telegram.
For those who encouraged me — from the beginning, or perhaps just recently.
I’m grateful.
For those who stepped in, stepped out, stayed.
For all the mirrors. For all the courage.
Because believe me…
what may seem natural now,
was anything but.
My survival strategy was always one of pleasing.
My gift? Feeling deeply.
But in the twisted ego-state of fear, I would completely merge with the other.
Where am I? Who am I?
And then… speaking from my truth —
that asked everything of me.
So many reprogramming sessions,
so many bumps that showed up —
and yet, because of all that…
I came closer and closer to myself.
Since January 1st, I’ve been sharing almost daily on social media.
Now it feels natural — but that wasn’t always the case.
Every step was another one outside my comfort zone.
And on April 1st, The Source App went live.
And since then…
I’ve become freer than ever.
I feel a vast field opening.
Inside me, it flows.
And around me… it works.
I’d love to share what has unfolded since then.
Without you… The Source wouldn’t exist as she does now. Thank you. For your presence. Your energy. Your remembrance.
What happened since the message…
From the moment Edwin texted me:
“Eef, shall we align?”
something started moving.
Immediately, new choices surfaced.
What are we going to do with the CoreTrack?
With the daily structure?
After tuning in deeply, the answer became clear:
We all get to return to Day 1.
Including me.
Not because something wasn’t right.
But because everything had evolved.
The energy has changed. My awareness has shifted.
And now I get to breathe through it again.
Not from the beginning — but from a deeper layer.
You’ve been sharing this, too:
how listening again reveals new truths.
How you receive differently.
How your own growth shows in how you hear, feel, and integrate.
And so, I’m reshaping the texts, adjusting the flow,
adding new audios —
so the 30-day free journey becomes a fully anchored foundation.
A clear, beautiful opening into everything that follows.
Building the field for what’s to come
Meanwhile…
so much creative energy is moving through me.
New themes want to emerge.
They’re already arriving.
And yet —
I know where the attention must go first.
The foundation. The field. The form.
Upgrading the website.
Refining the texts.
Revisiting the existing SideTracks.
Crafting new emails, posts, newsletters.
Everything flows together —
like an energetic tapestry,
weaving a container
for the deeper journeys that want to land.
I let myself be guided.
I sit down… and it flows.
Words, insights, clarity.
I stay present and let my intuition speak.
And then... someone unsubscribes
Oof.
What does that bring up?
Ah… an old story.
Separation. Doubt.
Did I do something wrong?
I feel. I breathe.
Yes — it’s ancient.
I see you. I feel you.
You’re allowed to be here.
And then — a shift.
What is the gift?
Ah…
I get to create a portal.
An energetic gateway of gratitude.
A deep bow.
Because who am I — with my human mind —
to know what’s meant to be?
Maybe one word was enough.
Maybe one breath.
It’s free.
Really free.
And so… I create a thank-you page.
Building the field for what’s to come
Meanwhile…
so much creative energy is moving through me.
New themes want to emerge.
They’re already arriving.
And yet —
I know where the attention must go first.
The foundation. The field. The form.
Upgrading the website.
Refining the texts.
Revisiting the existing SideTracks.
Crafting new emails, posts, newsletters.
Everything flows together —
like an energetic tapestry,
weaving a container
for the deeper journeys that want to land.
I let myself be guided.
I sit down… and it flows.
Words, insights, clarity.
I stay present and let my intuition speak.
The energetic structure becomes clearer
I test the SideTracks.
I revisit, rewrite, re-feel.
I build email sequences —
so the journey becomes a real experience.
I feel into what wants to come first.
And then next.
I write.
I post.
I breathe.
I feel.
What still needs to ripen?
What’s already ready?
What wants to be shared?
What still needs to be lived?
And always: feel.
Shift.
Stay present.
Because yes — it’s scary.
But it also feels so right.
Every step brings me closer to myself.
It expands the field.
It clears old beliefs and survival patterns —
of lack, of having to do it alone.
And so…
I keep walking. Step by step.
And then — a moment of grace
I go to test the new payment structure.
It wasn’t fully live yet.
I log into the system…
and I see it.
Someone from Canada has already subscribed to Premium.
And the first donations flowed.
I received a huge contribution from the US
and with that I planned a new photoshoot.
It is the time for that.
So much transformation; that deserves new photo's.
I am giving it to myself, out of love for all of this.
It is all coming.
Just like that.
Without prompts. Without emails.
With trust.
It touched me so deeply.
It still does.
Because it reflects something much bigger:
I am not alone.
We are not alone.
And I don’t know what will unfold next. But I can feel it coming. And I’m so grateful to share it with you.
And me?
I let it arise.
I am available.
I ride the current.
And I rest when needed.
Hammock. Sauna. Silence. A walk.
And then: writing. Recording. Sharing.
It comes. It flows.
And sometimes I cry, grieve, feel —
because so much opens.
But always: grateful.
I feel it in every cell:
A deep trust has been born.
I don’t need to know.
I don’t need to control.
I get to listen.
To be led.
By life itself.
By my Essence.
And so everything unfolds.
Perfect in timing.
Perfect in flow.
What is visible now,
has long been woven into the harmonica of time.
My soul knew the path.
And I only had to say… yes.
The Source is not something I made.
It is something that came through me.
As a field.
As a remembrance.
As a space for everyone who feels:
there is more.
And that ‘more’…
doesn’t live outside of you.
It lives within.
Maybe your — our — only task is simply to be available. For what wants to unfold through you.
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